You don't have to invite too many people into your life for the rest of your life.
Beautiful morning light, accompany you to read.
Life comes and goes, and we meet all kinds of people.
the friends who stay with us also come and go, come and go, and change one group after another.
I always want to walk side by side with my former best friends, and always want to be honest with my new friends.
it is not until reality wakes us up that we realize that not all people are worth inviting them into life.
only by learning to put down some unnecessary things and leave some deliberately maintained relationships, can you live up to your time and yourself.
01
circles are different, so there is no need to integrate
there is such a sentence: "if you are tired, your feet know; whether you are bitter, your heart knows."
the same is true of people getting along with others. Whether they can chat together or not, in fact, the feeling of communication between two people has already told you.
I remember that when I graduated from college, my deskmate in junior high school suddenly applied to add my Wechat.
We haven't been in touch for a long time, so I was very excited when I saw the friend add application he sent. After passing
, I immediately said hello to him and asked him what he was doing recently.
after waiting for a few minutes, he replied to me with a meme.
before I could send the words in the dialog box, he sent another link saying, "Please download this software and collect a compliment for me."
although I was a little lost, I quickly took care of it for him.
then, I look forward to our next chat. I want to know how he has been and how his work is going. We can talk about each other.
unfortunately, after only a few words, he obviously didn't want to talk to me in detail about some things, and he wasn't very interested in some of the things I said.
We probably found that we no longer had a common topic with each other, so we ended the conversation with polite greetings.
after that, his circle of friends slowly became a WeChat business.
he occasionally throws over a link, or sends a mass message, and I no longer reply. We all have a tacit understanding that we do not blend in with each other's circle.
at this point, I can't help feeling a little sad.
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when we were young, we always got together to talk about the hottest TV dramas and favorite novels, and we were sincere to each other without keeping secrets.
however, when we go deeper and deeper in each other's lives, we will be fettered by too many things, and the deep feelings we once believed can only watch it be buried by time.
when a flower blossoms, it will spread out in different circles, and it will always be at the ends of the earth.
the relationship between people can not be forced, everyone can only accompany us for a short walk, sooner or later will be separated.
respecting the circle of each other's life, keeping a distance and not crossing the line is the most tacit way for adults to deal with a relationship.
02
A casual acquaintance, it is better not to pour beer
when you pour beer, there is always a layer of foam on the glass, which seems to be about to overflow, but when you take a sip, you find it is full of breath.
the same is true of the relationship between people. Very often, once exposed, you will find that the affection you originally thought was deep and meaningful, which may not be true.
with the passage of time, I believe many people will have the feeling that
more and more people know each other, but fewer and fewer people can talk to each other.
Wechat is adding more and more friends, but few people are willing to give you a hand at the critical moment.
Zhihu netizen @ Wududa once shared his story:
A few years ago, when he first started his business, he always thought that "it is easy to walk with many friends".
so he will be happy to participate in all kinds of wine games, to make a lot of friends, but also for fear of being forgotten by others.
on one occasion, his company was unable to turn over its cash flow, and it looked like a crisis.
however, he was not so panicked, because the company still had some projects to be developed, and he thought that as long as he sought financing from his friends, the immediate difficulties would be overcome.
but what he never expected was that his business friends arranged all kinds of excuses to refuse him, but none of them were willing to lend him a helping hand.
when he was helpless, he was still a relative of the family and cobbled together to borrow money for him, so that the company survived.
after that, he suddenly realized that not all people are worth dating with all their hearts.
know people are unknown, do not know people deeply, no matter how much enthusiasm, will only be in vain.
Li Ka-shing has a saying:
give up those useless social activities and improve yourself, and your world will be bigger. "
when they were young, many people were always afraid of being "unsociable", so they went non-stop to go to one lively and prosperous scene after another, devoting a lot of time and energy to the wine table.
when you get older, you will find that
the more friends, the better. Three thousand casual acquaintances are not as good as bosom friends.
03
those who understand you, it goes without saying that
some people have described the acquaintance between people as follows:
you are free in the water, and I feel so excited on the shore that I can understand each other's true feelings even if I don't meet each other.
understand, is a kind of silent warmth, is an empathy, but also how much distance and time can not erase the tacit understanding.
it can be said that a friend who can understand you can be met but not sought..
in the TV series "Please answer 1988", the talented go teenager Cui Ze encountered his first failure.
at that time, he lost to a newcomer in the field of go, and the sixth paragraph lost to the first paragraph, which was an unacceptable blow for Aze.
the friends of the chess institute comforted him one after another, saying that it doesn't matter, he only lost once, and he is still the best.
although it was genuine comfort, those comforts added to his embarrassment and frustration.
after returning to the double doorway, everyone is also taking good care of Aze's mood.
however, after knowing this, all the friends who grew up with him in the same alley ran to his room to laugh and play with him.
Aze finally couldn't help laughing when the doll fish jokingly said that the often-winning general in go could not even go to the bathroom. In the lively atmosphere of
, the page about the keyword "failure" has been completely changed.
his mood also brightened.
there is a saying in Firefly Lane: "Life is a lonely journey, but I met you." You are not me, but you are like another me in the world. "
there will always be one or two friends in everyone's life who know each other and play the role of our unrelated relatives.
play with us, cry and laugh together is also the most beautiful bright spot in our ordinary life.
because he understands you, he can see through your desire to speak, the sadness and helplessness behind your silence.
come to think of it, the greatest blessing of a person is to meet a friend who understands you on the way to growth and maturity.
04
there is no need to invite too many people into life
Modern life is too busy and crowded.
endless messages every day, endless work, new friends constantly added to Wechat's address book.
Life is short, and time and energy are really limited.
if you always bring the wrong people into your life, they will not only be unable to enter your heart, but will also disturb your life so crowded.
after going through the bitterness of life and experiencing the warmth and coolness of human feelings in the world, it becomes more and more clear that
those relationships that come and go quickly, it doesn't matter.
those who are willing to go the same way with you do not need to try their best to please, and those who are willing to treat you sincerely will not ignore your enthusiasm.
Life is not long, and life is crowded enough that there is no need to invite too many people into life.
encourage!