There is a kind of self-cultivation called non-random evaluation.

in life, there is such a kind of people that you must have seen:

always think that they know everything, feel a little "superior" from time to time, and are used to judging others with their own perceptions and thoughts. and even use their own guesses to define other people's lives.

do not realize that the truth they think they know is only the tip of the iceberg floating on the surface.

because one can never know what others have experienced, nor can they understand how they really feel, let alone the whole truth behind them.

as Pavlov said:

because he "knows nothing", he will not easily judge others. It is not easy to evaluate others, reflecting a person's real connotation and accomplishment.

01

it's a kind of upbringing

recently, dancer Yang Liping pushed a video recording her life, but a comment in the message area sent her directly to the hot search.

the main idea of this netizen's comment is that Yang Liping's life only looks good on the surface, but in fact, it can't be a failure, because as a woman, she has no children, and no matter how excellent she is, she can't escape the devastation of time. The so-called living out of oneself is just deceitful.

there is a saying in Zhuangzi: "if you are not a fish, do you know the joy of fish?"

if you are not someone else, how can you know if others are living well and happily?

in her response to the comments, Yang Liping said very well: "as long as you think you are doing well and don't hurt others, you can."

this is true. Life is our own, such as drinking water, knowing whether it is warm or cold, and others have no right to interfere and criticize.

We should not easily define and evaluate others with our own values.

in our daily life, we often encounter similar situations:

if you don't get married after the age of 30, no matter whether you want to get married or not, you will be said to be a leftover woman and can't get married more and more.

if you get married and don't have children, not only will you be hastened, but some relatives will even ask you directly if you have any physical problems.

if divorced, some people will ridicule and despise you and even think that you will never be better in your life.

these people who judge others at will and define the happiness of others by their own attitude towards life are meddling in their own business and uneducated if they say too much.

as Mark Twain said:

A good upbringing lies in hiding our better evaluation of ourselves and our poor opinion of others.

A truly educated person will never easily evaluate others, let alone use his own limited vision to define the infinite life of others.

02

not easily judging others is a kind of kindness

Nietzsche said:

many times, we can't really empathize, let alone see all the truth, but at least we can choose to be kind.

I still remember that in the movie search, the heroine played by Gao Yuanyuan, Ye Lanqiu, had just been diagnosed with cancer. In a mixed mood, she refused to give up her seat to the old man on the bus and made sarcastic remarks. Unexpectedly, the matter was posted online. As a result, Ye Lanqiu received unprecedented criticism and attack.

netizens who don't know the truth not only abused and even began a cyber manhunt for Ye Lanqiu, which seriously affected her life, work and even treatment. Unbearable, she finally ended the cold by committing suicide.

as the saying goes, "good words are warm in three winters, but bad words hurt people in June." sometimes your casual comments cause fatal harm to others.

I remember that when I was in junior high school, there was a girl in the class, Xiao A was a single-parent family, and her poor financial condition was a poor student. One day her deskmate suddenly said that her newly bought pen was missing. Xiao A must have stolen it.

Xiao A firmly said that she didn't steal it, but her deskmate insisted: "the whole class is the poorest in your family. It's not who you stole!"

finally, the matter came to the teacher and called the parents of both sides. Although I don't know how the matter was resolved in the end, Xiao A changed her seat after the matter, but her deskmate will still make sarcastic remarks and beat around the bush that she is a thief.

as Qian Zhongshu said in besieged Fortress:

rumors spread faster than flu, contain more energy than meteors, are more malicious than hooligans, and make people more mentally haggard than miscarriages.

soon, the rumor that "Xiao An is a thief" spread throughout the grade. As a result, Xiao A became more silent. I remember that she dropped out of school without finishing that semester.

it is easy to judge others easily, but the consequences are often heavy. An evaluation you make casually may affect other people's lives.

Inspire and be delightfully charming when in our long sleeve bridesmaid dresses. Enjoy your shopping experience as well as our friendly and helpful customer service and fast shipping.

A really kind person will never judge others easily, because they know that "people's words are awesome" and don't want their words to turn into "swords" to stab anyone.

do not speculate on others with malice, let alone attack others with malicious words. Do not spread rumors, do not spread rumors, is a person's greatest kindness.

03

it is not easy to judge others, which is a kind of mature

has seen such a paragraph:

.

whether a person is mature or not often lies not in his age and appearance, but in his mind and accomplishment.

people who are really mature never judge others easily.

I remember that when I just graduated, I worked as an intern in a foreign company, and I had a total of five interns. According to my internship performance, the company would decide who finally became a regular employee.

one of us has a girl named Rongrong, who is not only beautiful, but also beautiful.Ye's school is still the best among us. I was high achiever when I was at school, and my ability in my work is also very strong.

however, for some people, it seems difficult to admit that others are better than themselves. on the contrary, they like to judge and denigrate others with their own limited knowledge.

after working for a period of time, an intern named Xiaohua often talks strangely about Rongrong everywhere. As long as Rongrong is not there when everyone is resting or eating, she is bound to say "bad things".

for example, the boss values Rongrong because she is beautiful and feels that it is unfair to her. Rongrong was publicly praised and raised her internship salary because of her excellent performance in a project. Xiaohua also said that others must have found a relationship or used a means behind her back, otherwise why would the treatment of Rongrong, as an intern, be so bad?

there is a good saying, "one leaf blinds the eye, but you can't see Mount Tai."

Xiaohua only sees the gains of others, but not the efforts of others.

Rongrong is one of our interns who gets off work late every day. She often does the same report more fully and carefully than we do.

once I threw rubbish at noon and accidentally saw Rongrong practicing English in the stairwell with printed documents, because she wanted to prepare in advance because she had to go to a meeting with the client with the manager in the afternoon.

Rongrong works harder than others, and if he gives the most, he will gain the most. But Xiaohua not only did not have Rongrong's efforts, but also spent all her energy on criticizing others, unwilling but only verbal struggle for strength, made frequent mistakes in her work, and finally could only be eliminated by the company.

to easily evaluate others with their own cognition and conjecture is not only unfair to others, but also exposes their own narrowness and childishness.

A truly mature person will not feel inferior because of the excellence of others, nor will he hate because others are stronger than himself. He will only focus on himself, and when he is strong, he will want to be stronger.

respect for others, respect for opponents, not easy evaluation, not malicious slander, is the highest state of maturity of a person.

04

there is an old saying: "when you sit still, you often think about your mistakes, and you can't talk about right or wrong."

Life is personal. If you haven't experienced other people's lives, don't define other people's happiness; don't judge others' character easily without knowing all the truth.

We should bear in mind that knowing people without judging others is a person's highest upbringing; not saying evil words is a person's greatest kindness; not wanton slander is a person's best maturity.

it is not easy to evaluate others, nor is it easy to be influenced by the evaluation of others. Only by going your own way, can you live the unique life you want.

share with my friends.