No one needs to be comforted.

it seems to be quite comforting when I am still willing to comfort people.

it is common to hear about friends' small gains: losing their wallet, mobile phone, or leaving early but being won a big prize! Whenever I hear such a plot, I always say faintly, "Oh, how come so many people have lost their wallets? yesterday, two of my friends also told me that my wallet had been stolen." Although in fact, what I heard was that my friend got another raise. In other words, "I have already lost several thousand when I went back to my hometown to play cards these two days." in fact, I was secretly delighted to win a few hundred yuan. Of course, I talked more about my miserable college roommate, who experienced a series of tragedies in which he lost his wallet last week, his cell phone was stolen this week, and then his new phone fell into the toilet yesterday. But coincidentally, there seems to be such a tragic and joyful character around everyone, "Oh, so is my friend so-and-so." The other party picked up. So we magnanimously forget our trivial losses in the pleasant atmosphere of talking about the misfortunes of others. The sadness of losing money comes from the fact that we always regard it as an "unexpected" loss that could and should have been avoided, but in fact, who can skillfully spend a life without losing money? With this in mind, the feeling of heartache will be relieved if losses such as losing your wallet are included in the budget of your life. People who lose money just complain, and it's not too annoying as long as they don't ask you to borrow money. Lovelorn people are so annoyed that they have to be kept at a "respectful distance". 

To deal with this kind of people, I generally recommend them to read Lian Yue or Zhuang Yating. Although Thoreau said, "only by loving more deeply can you heal the pain of love." if you look at all kinds of similar stories between men and women in the emotional column, you can find that "your pain is not special." but one of the countless vulgar stories that take place in the world every day can somehow make you underestimate your pain. This is just like a young girl walking to the abortion operating table at the moment. If she knew that this kind of thing happened 13 million times a year in this country, she would forgive herself more, and her nervousness and fear would certainly be reduced, so-- relax, push, and drain it out. If you have female friends over 25 and under 30, you know how the fear of getting old bothers a woman who is supposed to be young and happy. Compared with those before the age of 25, they are keenly aware that the passage of time no longer simply increases their beauty, and they are not used to or give up resisting such signs of aging, unlike women after the age of thirty. What's more, in our society, there is a strange and tacit rule: all the major events in life must be decided in their twenties, what they do, where they settle down, and who they marry. Those who can't settle down will be classified as losers. This adds to the troubles of first-time women. I can only comfort her with the words of wooden heart on architecture again and again: "there is a paragraph about architecture in the wooden heart that is particularly wonderful." 

He said that classical architecture is in harmony with the landscape of heaven and earth, and there is a new beauty when it is new. after the sun, rain, wind, and dust, the effect is often better, until it is turned into ruins, it still has the charm for people to mourn. But if you look at the modern office buildings in Zhongguancun that are looking for a new feeling, they will show decline and ugliness after they are a little dirty and a little old. So women don't just want to be young for a while. A girl like you who studies both inside and outside must, like classical architecture, has a rich sense of beauty with a level of evolution, and different periods have the beauty of different periods. Well, now I think you'll probably be as handsome as you will be ten years from now, and you'll feel more interesting at that time. " Although people's fear of aging, especially women, is a major theme of life, it always makes people laugh for a while. As for myself, after spending half of my life with no achievements worth mentioning, I have got along with my mediocrity and only want to "be a good and useless person". But I have many friends with literary ideals, who are still proud, sensitive, and fragile. For example, one of them saw each other too late after reading a classic the day before yesterday and wrote articles praising him. Friends have left messages of approval after his article, saying that they have also experienced a wonderful trip in this book. He was unhappy as if offended: why did they all speak as if they fully understood the subtleties and depths of great works, which require the same ingenuity of the mind to comprehend? I had to enlighten him and say, "what we can express is only a small part of what we can feel." If life is a sea, human sensibility is an iceberg, expression is only the tip of the iceberg.

 Of course, artists and people with noble and profound minds like you, although they are far more expressive than we ordinary people, often only express what we mortals can feel but cannot express. " When he heard this, I further said, "it's like when you saw A Dream of Red Mansions in primary school, you thought it was a great work, and now you see it is still a great work, so greatness can arouse universal resonance. Can your level in primary school be comparable to your current understanding?" After hearing that I equated those who left a message of approval with him in primary school, he finally smiled with relief. Because I have comforted those who are willing to comfort, I have also been comforted. Of course, I am not so smug that I think I can comfort others. But those who are willing to be comforted by you temporarily forget their troubles because of the kindness of your comfort. And worry-- the heartache of losing money, the pain of being lovelorn, the fear of getting old, the mediocre struggle-- will spread after a while. There are many kinds of troubles, of course, far more than the ones I gave a rough example. "Life is always at a loss what to do", although hypocritical, but close to the truth. It is said that in the world of asexual reproduction, every individual is the same, just like Sun Dasheng Hanmao's countless Sun Dasheng, I am me, others are me, and there is no competition with each other. I think there may be no happiness but no pain.

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but as advanced as "human", "I" is me, "others" are others, so we only see conflict, conquest, possession, and dissatisfaction. Born human, I'm sorry to be planted with loneliness and uneasiness in the genes. In. So Zhuang Yating said, "I haven't seen a happy person." what's interesting is that another female writer, Liao Yimei, said the same thing. She said, "I've seen a lot of smart, excellent, sharp, powerful, and attractive people. But I've never met a happy person." Once upon a time, I thought it was only because of my imperfection that I had that kind of uneasy moment. Later, I met more blessed people, they are either beautiful, rich, or smart, they are even beautiful, rich, and smart, I found that their dissatisfaction is as obvious as insecurity. I don't think I've seen a really strong person, and no one doesn't need to be comforted.