Lotus root robbery

1, the principle of crime

"We do not commit crimes."

"firmly do not kill."

"We don't do it because we're afraid. It's our principle. Do you understand, principle? we need to be clear about our motive for committing a crime and what we are committing a crime for."

"for money."

"is money. Fine. Let me ask you, if someone offers us more money than this plan, do we still want to commit a crime? "

No one will give us money. "

"suppose someone will give us money. suppose a psychopath comes to our house and sees that our desks are all piled up with manuscript paper. We feel that we are suffering and feel that we are poor unborn artists. If you want to give us a sum of money, let's say it's 8 million. We have 8 million yuan, so whether we should commit a crime or not. "

"Why 8 million? we can only get 6 million at most this time."

"well, let's assume 6 million."

"6 million, my God, no one will give 6 million for no reason, and God won't do it. Money is earned, not blown by the wind."

"assume! If! What I'm talking about is hypothetical, can we still discuss the problem? you always do. That's why we can't sell the script. You always think about it from a secular point of view. I mean, romantically, if someone gives us money, do we still want to commit a crime? "

Why do you have to discuss this before implementing the plan? we are going to commit a crime. Nothing can stop us from committing a crime. I'm talking about us. I made this plan with secular eyes, and it has nothing to do with romance. We write it into a screenplay and shoot a three-or five-minute micro-movie. They don't want this kind of thing. They don't need a careful plan to make a short film about robbing a bank. Can you understand this? This plan is enforceable, and just for this point, we should also realize it. Within three minutes, we will get 6 million yuan. We have to let them know that we have the brains to get 6 million dollars, but we are writing them a story of six thousand dollars, and we have to prove it. "

"I really can't discuss things with you. I'm talking about the assumption that the reason the script doesn't sell is that you forget whether we're going to write a good story or rob a bank. We haven't thought about robbing a bank before, and we don't have a dream about it. We are going to be famous movie masters in the world, you have to surpass Coppola, OK is fine, but first you have to surpass his daughter, that little Coppola, do you think you are better than her? All the plays we sell now are advertising stories, and we have to look at ourselves from a higher point of view. The buyer wants a story that shows that his security equipment is unassailable, not the current one, where you managed to grab 6 million yuan in three minutes. You know what I mean? now is not the time to talk about ideals. I ask again, why do we commit crimes? "

"for money."

"Yes, for money, for the rent of three thousand yuan, so that we don't live on the street, not for our dreams. Our dream is not this, not to rob banks and become rich, you know? it's not to prove that a storyteller has the ability to rob banks. We just do it for money. Tell me, money, money money."

"money."

"well, now let me ask you, if someone gives us 8 million, so as you say, 6 million, do we still want to carry out this criminal activity?"

"Yes."

"that's the answer I want. Oh, my God, why are you so tired talking to you?" Can you tell me why you want to rob money when you have it? "

"I refuse to answer this question. My why is never the same as yours. All I know is that we are going to rob a bank. We have to get there before the bank closes."

"well, I'll allow you to keep your thoughts." Rodin removed the lunch box from the table, spread out their plan, spread out less than five pages of paper one by one, and mixed it with the table made of paper.

"Don't talk to me in that tone." Yogurt Qiang Qiang said. He used his sleeve to wipe the yogurt bottle he had drunk so that he could squeeze the next bag of yogurt into it. "We are equal, I do not need you to allow me to think, you know, I have put up with you for a long time, you do not think that 12 minutes older than me is my boss, think of the Cohen brothers, they are equal, think of the Wachowski siblings, they are two people, not one person, two people's thoughts can collide into a great movie. If you agree with me, there is no point in the existence of the yoghurt brothers. Yes, you are very thoughtful, you are also very romantic, this is what I lack. I also do not agree with you a lot of views, what to surpass Coppola is to surpass little Coppola, this is not a monster upgrade, I am not interested in little Coppola, I just want to take care of the old one. "

"well, you're right, as twins, we don't have to be the same. You see, now you're so much fatter than me, I didn't say anything. I just want to emphasize the principle that when we want to do something, we need to know why we do it. "

"for money." Yogurt strong showdown, "of course, for money, if we had a little money, I would not break up with Ke Mengdan, we scared her, brother, absolutely, she was moved by my talent, but scared by my life." She has never seen such a failure, so talented losers, this is what we suspect, if we are really talented, why we failed. And damn yogurt-"Yogurt Qiangqiang put the yogurt on the manuscript paper." I just think the yogurt is good in the name, but you let me drink it endlessly. Well, now I'm addicted to yogurt. I am so poor that I still have to drink yogurt, and it has to be bottled yogurt. "

"this is the degree of recognition. when you become a master in the future, you will be the only master of yogurt." Rodin said, "so that people can remember us, if you do not drink yogurt, I can only tattoo on the forehead, you have made a choice, you do not like my tattoos, I do not tattoo, I respect your opinion very much."

"it's definitely the wrong decision." Yogurt Qiangqiang said, "once Ke Mengdan wanted to buy a cheap lipstick, but you bought me yogurt. Do you know what she thinks of us two brothers?"

"Don't mention her name again." Rodin was a little excited. "she almost destroyed you, she almost destroyed the yoghurt brothers." Now is definitely not the time to think about love, good love will destroy the brain of genius, the bad thing is, only missing the pursuit of unavailable love is the continuous creativity, is the engine of art. From now on, I want you to forget her and burn her as a failure story. "

"I can't do it. You are so heartless. Don't forget who provided for us for half a year."

"and don't forget how failed the screenplay was in those six months." "that's the end of the discussion about her," Rodin said. "Let's go through the plan again."

"I wrote it." Yogurt Qiangqiang said, "I keep it in mind."

"We have to rehearse. This is the charm of the play. Only rehearsals can find the problem." Come, the first act, afternoon, 04:00 street, the sun is at an angle of about 70 degrees, and the reflection of the crowd happens to be printed on the glass wall-"

2, criminal impulse

yoghurt brothers put on black suits, bring pre-bought sunglasses and inflatable dolls, homemade thick-tube shotguns, Rodin learned to make props, and the inflatable dolls were dressed like a silent philosopher, wearing a bowler hat and a thick beard. It almost covers the whole face. The three of them walked together in straight suits and looked very imposing. The inflatable doll walked in the middle under the control of two people, and his body looked heavy, stuffed with fresh enemas and pig offal. The brain is not new. They brought it back from the dinner on Saturday. They made lifelike props with limited funds, which made Rodin more sure of his talent and had a feeling that he was not far away from the master.

"I wish I could get someone to film it." "this is a living movie masterpiece," Rodin said. "

"you should have said so." Yogurt Qiangqiang held the inflatable doll's hand and walked easily. His other hand was in his pocket. His suit pocket was a little bulging. It was a bottle of yogurt. They are restricted to bringing only one thing that has nothing to do with the plan. Luoding's is a bag of Nanjing.

"well, if you shoot this script after success, you won't write it in vain."

"keep your word." Yogurt Qiangqiang said, "I'll be the director."

"of course you are the director." Rodin said, "my movies have to be romantic and have women. Not now, she is obviously a woman, but we dress her up as a man, brutally cut off her breasts and put on duct tape, is it really good? What's wrong with bringing a woman directly? "

"the woman is so eye-catching that we have to let him explode without warning and his brains spatter all over the anti-theft window. This is my script. I know the psychology of the audience. Only in this way can they listen to us." Yogurt Qiangqiang said, "and remember, he has a name, his name is Nietzsche, you have to remember the name of the character."

"you're right, but in terms of audio-visual language, a woman being blown to pieces looks much better than a man, and a woman's voice is better than a man's."

"Yes!" Yogurt Qiangqiang said, "it was so intolerable that I forgot to scream. At the moment of being blown up, he would make some noise. He had to make some noise."

"what's that sound?"

"the cry is, first, the sound of air compression, and then the cry."

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"what is the sound of air squeezing?"

"just like this." The yogurt strongly lowered his voice and imitated, "come on, let's find a place to rehearse. I make the sound of air squeeze and you scream."

they sat down on the street corner and rehearsed for a while until Qiangqiang was satisfied with the yogurt before going to the bank.

"Let's go, while there are so many people."

"not yet," said Qiangqiang of yoghurt. "look at the reflection, it's not more than 2/3 of the glass wall. let's wait a little longer and wait for the sun to go down a little bit."

"I think the sun now should be called sunset."

"what?"

"it's almost going down, so it's more appropriate to call it sunset." Rodin said.

"it will be two hours before it falls." Yogurt Qiang Qiang said, "even if it goes down, I will call it the sun. For people farther west of the earth, it doesn't set at all, it's just turning in a circle."

"Oh, my God, it's crazy." Rodin took off his sunglasses. He was a little excited, and Mr. Nietzsche in the middle was squeezed in and squeaked. "Why can't you be romantic? how beautiful the sunset is, and see if you can stop being so thorough."

"thorough can also be romantic." Yogurt Qiangqiang said, "for example, Nietzsche, this guy has also been crazy by love."

Rodin ordered a branch in Nanjing. He handed Nietzsche to yogurt Qiang Qiang, stood up to smoke, and quietly observed the surrounding environment. When he was about to finish smoking a cigarette, he went to Qiangqiang of yogurt and asked him to drink some yogurt.

"Why don't you have some yogurt?"

"Why should I drink some yogurt?"

"it's time to act. Aren't you nervous?"

"nervousness is not the mood we should have." Yogurt Qiangqiang said, "I don't like you like this, walking around, smoking, looking left and right, looking like a robber." The really good criminals don't feel nervous and don't care.Others, once a careful plan is made, no one can influence you. "

they sat on the bench on the street for about fifteen minutes. Rodin smoked three cigarettes and still looked left and right. Yogurt Qiangqiang did not drink yogurt and sat with Mr. Nietzsche in silence. He looked at the reflection on the glass wall and calculated the timing.

"look at that woman." Rodin said, "the one who just came out of the bank, the one in the brown dress, yes, that's the one. It's so beautiful that she is absolutely suitable for playing Montha in "Beautiful New Horizon". "

"that's not brown, that's lotus root." Yogurt Qiangqiang said, and jumped as if he had been bitten by a dog. "that's the dress Kou Mengdan was talking about."

"what?"

"I promised her that I would give her this skirt."

"what?"

"Kou Mengdan saw it on a foreign website. She said she loved the designer and the dress, but I couldn't afford it at that time."

"now I can afford it and I can't give it away." Rodin said, "time is up."

"No, I'm going to give her that dress. I don't give her those plush toys for a reason. I want to give her something meaningful. The skirt is the meaning, the skirt makes a woman into a woman, the woman who wears the skirt is lovable, I have to give Ke Mengdan this dress. "

Yogurt ran so hard that he forgot that Mr. Nietzsche was still with him and tripped. He pushed Mr. Nietzsche away to chase the woman who was about to disappear around the corner. Rodin was so baffled that he had to pick up Mr. Nietzsche and catch up.

they caught up with the woman in the lotus root dress in front of a laundry.

"wait a minute." Yogurt yelled strongly, he was in a state of semi-out of control, I do not know whether it was because of running or excitement, his voice was a little out of tune.

several people looked back, and yogurt Qiang screened out the woman with her eyes.

"what can I do for you?" This is beauty. She not only looks beautiful, but also has a beautiful voice. She looked at the three breathless men in front of her. Mr. Nietzsche looked mysterious with a low hat, a big beard and no breath.

"your skirt is very nice." Yogurt Qiang Qiang strives to calm himself down and return to the elegance and depth that an art creator should have.

"Thank you." Beauty smiles politely, this is beauty, she has the qualities that a high-quality beauty should have.

"May I ask where I got it?" Yogurt Qiangqiang said, "this dress is really great."

"Sun." Rodin said to one side, "look at the sun. We have to follow the script."

"script?" The beauty said, "are you filming something?" Random street shooting? A questionnaire? "

"No," said Qiangqiang of yogurt. "I just want to know where you got this dress."

"it's a gift." The beauty smiled and then became sad.

"it's a wonderful gift, to tell you the truth, I also--"

"who sent it, boyfriend." Rodin chimed in, "Qiang Qiang, we have to make it quick."

"ex-boyfriend." Another smile, a little bitter.

"Sorry, we shouldn't have asked that." Yogurt Qiangqiang pushed Rodin aside. "do you know where he bought it?"

"it seems that his friend gave it to him." The beauty had a premonition that the conversation would not end so soon, so she walked on, and the yoghurt brothers had to follow. "it's the designer of this dress. They weren't ready when they gave it to me. At that time, they were just friends at Fashion week. You know, it was just a courtesy between a magazine editor and a cutting-edge designer. He praised her for making a beautiful dress, and she gave it to him right after the show. At that time, I was only concerned about being happy, and I actually lost the sensitivity that a woman should have. What does it mean to give her work to the opposite sex? for an artist, her work is life, and she is flirting with him. This is a kind of rapid flirting. I was defeated so fast that I failed so quickly-"

Beauty talks about the past, just like all women. As the sun was about to set, Rodin was impatient and kept gesturing with the yogurt, intending to knock out the beauty in an empty street and snatch the skirt to continue their unfinished plan. Yogurt Qiangqiang firmly said no. Rodin had to do it himself, drawing a thick-tube shotgun from Mr. Nietzsche's clothes, ready to knock out the beauty. Yogurt stubbornly guarded the beauty immersed in memories and stopped Rodin's attack. When the beauty sensed that she was looking back, they immediately pretended to listen carefully.

"so, this is really a dress with a story." Yogurt Qiang Qiang said.

"Yes, there is only one dress in the world to fulfill their adultery."

"only one." Yogurt Qiangqiang said, "it looks like I can't buy it."

"the script will not be finished." Rodin said, "the sun has gone down."

script? What script? " The beauty looked very interested. she looked back and looked at the three people in front of her in the sunset. She noticed that Mr. Nietzsche never said a word. "how come your friend hasn't been talking?"

"he's our literary consultant," Rodin said. "he's usually thinking."

"Oh, so, so you're making a movie?" Beauty seems to be more interested.

"Yes, the movie!" Rodin said, "it's a movie, it's great. It's called

" Let's just say skirt. " Yogurt Qiangqiang said, "is there any way for you to sell me the dress?"

"Why should I sell it to you?" Feeling offended, the beauty turned her attention completely to the strength of the yogurt.Transfer to Rodin.

"that's right," Rodin said. "We're going to make a movie, and your dress meets the requirements of a prop in our movie."

"really? What a movie. "

"an absolutely great movie." "We call it the Beautiful New Horizon," Rodin said. Note that vision is not the world of the world, but the vision of the field of vision, why this vision rather than that world, because this is a film about eyes, to be exact, a film about beauty and ugliness. By the way, you are very suitable for playing the beautiful woman in it. "

"really, thank you." The beauty looked surprised. "what's this movie about?"

"talk about beauty and ugliness." Rodin squeaked Mr. Nietzsche wobbly, "talk about the visual prejudice of our present world, and tell the adventure story of an extraordinary beauty with philosophical vision and depth."

"tell me that story." The beauty said, "I want to hear it."

before I tell you, I want to tell you that this is the work of our yogurt brothers. We are diced yogurt, come on, yogurt is strong, you drink a mouthful of yogurt. "

yoghurt Qiangqiang took out a sip of yogurt.

"well, now let me tell you the story. The story begins with a very ugly woman who married the most talented director in the world. Because she helped the director when he was penniless, and the director, as we all know, the director likes to shoot beautiful women in movies, how could he not be moved when he filmed so many beautiful women, so he had sex with a stunning actress. Of course, the ugly girl did not accept defeat, it was she who created the director, but let others enjoy the success. Coincidentally, she is not a vegetarian, this is the mechanics of film, the villain must not be a vegetarian. Of course, I don't call her a villain, she's not a villain, she's a revolutionist of human civilization. Coincidentally, she is also a biologist, and she has been conducting a secret research, which is to transform the human body, to be exact, to transform the eye's recognition of the environment. Of course she succeeded, otherwise the movie would have been shot. On the night of the Golden Horse Awards, the beautiful actress and director mysteriously disappeared after receiving the award. Needless to say, she was kidnapped by an ugly girl to conduct an experiment. Of course the experiment was successful, otherwise the movie would have been shot. Ugly woman successfully changed the world, she reversed people's aesthetic, turned the actress into ugly, turned herself into beautiful, and this virus can spread, just a few days later, the mainstream aesthetic of the world was completely subverted, except for a small number of primitive people. "

"subverted!" The beauty seemed to be frightened, "it's terrible, that is to say, I will become ugly in the end, are you criticizing the beautiful woman?"

"you won't get ugly." Rodin said, "this is also a great initiative, in this film we will not give you makeup, but directly exchange actors, let you directly play the ugly woman before, and you are still beautiful, just changed roles."

"you have a grudge against beautiful women." The beauty said, "I won't be in this movie."

"We like beautiful women." Rodin said, "We are criticizing today's world, criticizing the face of the world, you know."

"you are so hypocritical that you like beautiful women and criticize the world of looking at faces at the same time."

"that's not true." Rodin said, "you keep the problem simple. I'll explain it to you where your home is."

"Why not go to your house?"

"my house is such a mess that you won't like it."

"all right, let's go to my house." The beauty stopped and opened the door. It turned out that they had walked along the house several times.

3. Crime plan

if you don't go according to the plan, you won't know what happened.

-- excerpt from the strong script of yogurt

it's completely dark. The yoghurt brothers were very excited, and although the strong eyes of the yogurt were still fixed on the dress, it was not just the dress that made him happy. After three hours of long talk, Rodin successfully persuaded the beauty to take part in the film in this luxurious single-family villa. A bigger gain is that the beauty decided to use her money as the first auction fund, and then to attract more investment. From the twinkling eyes of the beauty, we can see that she has been deeply impressed by Rodin's talent. Yogurt Qiangqiang and Mr. Nietzsche lay on the leather sofa, drinking beautiful wine, comfortably shaking their glasses, ready to sit back and enjoy the success. It seems that the brothers will be able to carve up the beauty in half an hour at the most. Rodin stayed to spend the night with her, and he took his skirt and left. At this moment, he was figuring out how to ask Kou Mengdan out to tell her that he was about to achieve something.

"that's it." "if we finish shooting this year, we can still catch up with next year's Oscars," Rodin said. "

"that's great." The beauty jumped up and said, "you have another drink."

the beauty went to pour the wine, and the two brothers sat down and high-fived to celebrate. The beauty gave them the wine and looked at the two happy children as big as children. then she frowned and poured another glass. "have a drink for your friend, too."

"he's asleep." Yogurt Qiangqiang said, "he is too tired today."

"well, it may be painful if you don't drink."

"Why is it painful?" Rodin said.

"because my husband is coming out." The beauty said. She picked up the phone and said in a completely different cold tone, "Honey, dinner is ready. Come on down."

A strange noise came from upstairs. The yoghurt brothers looked up and a wheelchair fell from the sky. When it landed on the floor, they found that it was a strong man. Although he was in a wheelchair, he could still see his strong upper body. The wheelchair hung Weiya and was transformed into a chariot. There are two pistols equipped with silencers on the sides of both hands, and directly above them is a shot as thick as a gun barrel.It's something. The man's head was under the barrel, with a baby-like mischievous smile:

"well well well, look what you brought me. Three men in black. Oh, my God, have they disarmed? "

"they are just writers." The beauty said, "they are unarmed."

"Writer, you bring home people who are so poor."

"wait a minute, what's going on?" Rodin tried to stand up and found that his legs were out of order. "Dude, your props are so cool."

"that's not true," said Mr. wheelchair. "you should ask me what I'm going to do."

"Sorry, professional habits, your hands-on ability is too strong, I am ashamed." Rodin said.

"so what do you do?"

"I am a writer." Rodin said, "We were going to rob a bank this afternoon."

"impressive, even you can cheat a bank robber." Mr. wheelchair pointed the gun at the yoghurt brother, the gear turned, and the gun quickly adjusted its direction. Mr. Nietzsche, who was sitting in the middle, had no gun to point to, so Mr. wheelchair had to mobilize the cannon, and all three were at gunpoint.

"now, can you tell me what they have?" Mr. wheelchair asked his wife again.

"they have stories." Answered the beauty.

"Story?" Mr. wheelchair smiled an incredible smile, and it was obvious that he was blaming his wife, "what are we going to do with the story?"

"A story that is very valuable, a story that can win an Oscar." The beauty said, "Mr. Luo, please say it again."

"this is a story about beauty and ugliness-- the following omits 5,000 words-- as long as you take part in this story, you will win a complete victory." Rodin was still excited.

"got it." Mr. wheelchair said, "that's a good story. I recorded it all." We'll film this story, and you can rest in peace. "

"wait a minute, you can't shoot this story without us yogurt brothers." Rodin tried to stand up again, and he succeeded. The wheelchair looked at his wife reproachfully, complaining that she had not done her preliminary work well.

"sit down, sit down." Mr. wheelchair got nervous.

"this movie needs a surreal expression and an extremely realistic setting." Rodin is still immersed in expounding his ideas. "there are a lot of things that are not what you think, such as a simple prop. Take this electric iron as an example, be sure to put it in tone -"

"put it down immediately. Mr. wheelchair became nervous, and with a slight noise, Rodin fell to the ground.

"Don't do anything." Mr. wheelchair, once again.

yoghurt is strong. He wasn't scared. Before Mr. wheelchair turned his attention, he held up Mr. Nietzsche. The trained wheelchair, aware of the danger, immediately pressed the button of the cannon.

this shot is really not covered. Probably even Mr. wheelchair has not fired this shell, it is a little rusty, but it does not hinder the power of the shell. Mr. Nietzsche was completely broken to pieces, the smoke of the shells had not gone away, and fresh internal organs fell all over the sky.

Yogurt Qiang quickly rolled under the wheelchair and pulled off Mr. wheelchair's prosthetic leg and gave him a blow on the head. As soon as the beauty was about to fight back, the yogurt forcefully turned the wheelchair. He didn't learn to shoot, but he hit the middle of the eyebrow, thanks to his calmness and persistence, he didn't want to get that dress dirty.

two people who were equally unable to walk waged a life-and-death struggle in the bloody mansion. In the end, yogurt Qiangqiang strangled Mr. wheelchair with his artificial leg.

4, unexpected joy

the loud sound of gunfire, of course, attracted the police.

Yogurt Qiangqiang had regained consciousness in her legs when the police came. He took off her skirt and changed her into home clothes. Rodin was shot in the left chest and almost died. He stayed in the hospital for more than two months.

in the wheelchair couple's garden, the police exhumed more than 30 bodies, and the yoghurt brothers received a medal for bravery and were invited to major television stations to tell this thrilling story. Of course, it will also be accompanied by a series of messy stories such as "Beautiful New Horizon" at random. Although the film is unlucky for wheelchair couples, it has received olive branches from dozens of studios, including Paramount. At present, the yoghurt brothers are in talks with some companies about the details of the film.

the day Rodin was discharged from the hospital was undoubtedly a major event in the press, with countless cameras waiting in front of the hospital. In the TV broadcast picture, we can see that yogurt Qiangqiang and a young woman in a lotus root dress came to pick up Rodin from the hospital. On the stone steps in front of the hospital, Rodin said to the yogurt:

"yoghurt is strong, why don't you drink some yogurt."

Note:

Note:

key props: inflatable dolls and teller's mother.

key message: the teller mother will come to deposit money on the fifth of each month.