If you learn these three points, everyone can raise excellent children.

01

the demolition money for my colleague's home has finally come down.

before they could experience getting rich overnight, they were in debt of more than two million yuan.

it turns out that for the sake of their children's education, the couple took the demolition money as a down payment and bought the "old and poor" school district in the third Ring Road.

colleagues sleep on a hard bed separated from the living room, telling themselves over and over again that "it's all for the children."

in addition to trying their best to earn the school district housing, in order to "not lose at the starting line", ordinary people dare not imagine what parents can do.

before, some netizens posted to their moments that they had seen a real "chicken blood mother" in the delivery room.

as soon as she got back to the ward from the operating room, with a drip on her arm, she began to make a voice call with her boss: "I looked at English and misspelled two words, which is a bit wrong." If you open the * * APP, you will finish 1234 today. Is there anything you don't understand after listening to today's Mathematical Olympiad class? "

then hang up the voice phone, turn on the" Li Weng Rhyme "prepared in advance in your cell phone, put it in the ear of the second child who has not yet defecated, and say," come on, baby, today's morning teaching begins. "

and this is a mother who has been in the delivery room for less than three hours.

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02

most parents have the mentality of "looking forward to the success of their children", and everyone hopes that their children can achieve success in life.

however, on the road to success, parents are tired and their children are equally tired.

Children are anxious as hard as their parents are.

parents' efforts and expectations have become a heavy burden on their children.

it seems that only by being successful can we live up to their expectations and cultivation over the years.

Why are our parents so obsessed with success?

psychologists give us the answer: people have a preference that when they see something that is incomplete, they always want to make it up.

I think parents who want their children to succeed probably have the same mentality that they always want their children to fill in what they have failed to do.

the expectation of excellence for children is actually nothing but to make up for their long-cherished wish.

however, in this state of mind, harm is inevitable.

I saw an interview with a young photographer.

his parents are both doctors, so he was arranged for the future as soon as he was born.

in order to prevent their children from taking detours, parents use their own experience to draw a conclusion: "doctors have a future, so don't think about other directions." "

but the boy refused: I don't want to live like my parents. I don't want to live just to survive.

there are too many such stories in life, and not many people really dare to "rebel" like him.

most children choose to be obedient and bear the pressure from their parents in the name of filial piety.

however, what they lose is precisely the most precious thing in life: the opportunity to live out.

Haisang said in the poem for Children: "you are not my hope, no, you are your own hope." "

in fact, it doesn't take much effort for parents to raise excellent children.

just follow the trend and find them unique.

03

many parents worry that their children will not be able to keep up when they are young, and it will be difficult step by step when they grow up.

but in fact, children are already overwhelmed where their parents can't see them.

there's nothing wrong with wanting your child to be good, but what's wrong is that the standard of excellence is too stereotyped.

good parents all know how to appreciate their children's unique

internationally renowned dancer Xu Fangyi once talked about her childhood experience in a TED speech.

she said that her parents' education was very low, and it was not easy for her father to start from scratch. Parents expect of themselves is to study hard, in the future can be a teacher, sit in the office, do not have to work so hard every day.

so even though Xu Fangyi loved dancing from an early age, she forced herself to study hard in order to meet her parents' expectations. But every time I open the book, I feel that the book is looking at her, not that she is reading the book, so my homework is naturally not good.

Family members always say that if their homework still doesn't improve, they will have to go out and work as women.

Xu Fangyi was very scared. She didn't dare to dream, nor did she dare to think about it, because she didn't do well in her studies and felt that she had no future and no future.

until the age of 19, Xu Fangyi met Ross Parks, a famous Australian dance teacher.

the teacher inadvertently said, "this child has great potential in dancing", which moved Xu Fangyi very much.

she never thought that anyone in the world could support her dream.

from that day on, Xu Fangyi was no longer afraid. She dared to dream. She wanted to be a professional dancer.

learn to appreciate children, they have so many excellent qualities in addition to their grades.

allow children to be different so that they can live a wonderful life of their own.

subtract children to allow them to grow up slowly

in order to cultivate "competitive children", it is easy for us to cram English, dancing, musical instruments and sports into them.

We always hope that he will get more so that he will not "hate less when he uses his books".

as a result, the training fee was spent a lot, the children did not learn the same, and they were even bored with the projects they were interested in in the first place under the pressure of their parents.

parents begin to worry about their children's education as soon as they reach the age of two.

send the kindergarten. The state also has a regulation that you can't enter the kindergarten until you are three years old. Think about it and send your children to a private house.I went to kindergarten.

as a result, the child is too young to adapt to an unfamiliar environment.

can not fully understand the teacher's instructions, often cry, coupled with poor resistance, within two days to catch a cold.

parents also get angry, which is really counterproductive.

knowledgeable parents will subtract their children's education.

they understand their children's differences and respect their children's rhythm.

neither do they worry themselves, nor do they rush to pull out seedlings to encourage them.

the child's character is more important than grades

I once went on a business trip and met a mother and son on a train.

chatting with my mother, I found that no matter what topic she talked about, she could talk about the child.

then all kinds of sighs: "I've spent so much money, but the kids just don't give it." "

however, I found that the child was not as unworthy as his mother said.

he is a very polite child.

always look at me carefully when you talk to me and listen patiently to my chatter.

when it comes to your interests and hobbies, you are also sensible.

especially before getting out of the car, the way he cleared the table made me feel deeply: why can't his mother see such a nice child?

04

in fact, very often, the value of a child does not necessarily need the blessing of a famous school.

some time ago, the warm behavior of the little boy after a period of torrential rain maxed out the moments.

the sudden rainstorm in Shijiazhuang has caused serious water accumulation on some roads.

A little boy acted as a little angel in front of the road for fear that passers-by would get hurt.

the middle-aged man was knocked down in a car accident, and the passing seven-year-old boy used his small body to shade him from the sun until 120 arrived.

in fact, there are many such things in life.

these children may not be high achiever, and they have not been able to counterattack.

but isn't their kindness another kind of excellence?

parents often have good intentions for their children to succeed.

as Aya said in Adventures: "Mom will not think you are an unsuccessful person, she must think you are a very good child." She's just worried that you can't take care of yourself. "

because we have experienced the cruelty of the world, we are afraid that our children will follow their own path in the future.

but the child is still young, they only see our harshness and criticism, and he will misunderstand whether we don't love him at all.

maybe we can express our love and concern for them in another way.

worry less, pay more attention, take less two cram classes, and explore the world with your children.

even if they don't get into the top primary school, their grades can't compete with their next-door neighbors, and it doesn't affect them from becoming happy people.

good parents know how to manage their anxiety.

instead of transferring the pressure of the adult world to their children prematurely, they know how to let go and let them play freely.

in fact, the ability of children is far beyond our imagination.

as long as they are given enough time and space, each child can shine a unique light.

the best thing parents can leave their children is not a passbook or a house, but an opportunity to be themselves.