Don't make excuses for hooligans in matters like sexual harassment. + the story of a woman catching hooligans

I was nine and a half years old when I first met hooligans. I was scared at that time. At that time, our city was still very small, and at a Xinhua bookstore, going to read books was as joyful as the Spring Festival. One day after breakfast, my parents took me to the city center to play. I went to Xinhua Bookstore. They were outside chatting with friends. At that time, I was sitting next to a more remote bookshelf, reading a picture album, and then the hooligans appeared. I still remember his appearance, in his forties and fifties, with small eyes and greasy features. He pretended to be close to me with a book and pinched my chest, which had just begun to develop. I felt very embarrassed and reluctant to give up the books in my hand, so I ran away to the crowded place and sat on the bookshelf there, thinking that I could feel at ease in broad daylight. I didn't expect him to follow me, and this time I pinched it up unscrupulously. I pushed his hand away and said what were you going to do? he approached me and whispered, "Little sister, do you feel comfortable?" Is there any? " I shouted "Psycho" and threw the book in his face. Everyone around us was looking at us, but no one came up to ask what was going on. I flew out of the bookstore, and he followed me out, saw my parents, and quickly ran away. My mother asked me what was wrong with you and how pale your face was. I couldn't say a word.

when I was less than ten years old, I chose silence.

my mother's friend's daughter was raped by her distant relatives when she was nine years old. At that time, the uncle's distant relatives came to play at home, but the aunt was not at home. To entertain the guests out to buy fruit, the uncle only left his daughter and relatives at home. Unexpectedly, he found his daughter lying naked on the ground crying, and the relatives had disappeared. After that, my aunt almost cried blind, and my uncle suddenly went white. In the end, they chose not to report the case, first because relatives in their hometown came to "mediate", and second, because they were afraid that the news would spread even more unfavorable to their daughters. Today's girls are about to be stabbed in the spine by rapists, not to mention the remote towns in the early 1990s. And even if they try their best to cover it up, some people often point behind their backs, so the couple soon moved with their daughter. I heard that this sister has been depressed and very afraid of seeing people since then, and finally, she was admitted to a mental hospital when she was an adolescent. she is still in a bad state and is very miserable at home.

my mother was scared to death by this. From then on until I was in high school, every time I went back to school, she told me not to let anyone touch me or go with anyone. If there is only a single male teacher in the room, you can't go in there, and so on. But she never forgot to add: the most important thing for a girl is to be clean.

keep yourself clean. My mother was very thorough about my sex education, but there was one big problem: she taught me a serious sense of shame: it's shameful to be naked and shameful to be touched. She's afraid she has a reason. There are too many women around us. My aunt and her best friend suffered frequent domestic violence after marriage because of "losing their virginity before the marriage." her colleague's daughter was date raped and was determined to withdraw from her marriage before marriage, and almost went mad. The next-door neighbor's brother lived with his girlfriend for several years and dumped the girl in her early thirties, resulting in "she doesn't like even divorced coal diggers." Wait. She always felt that if they were clean enough, they would not be so. She has always stressed time and again that if her chastity is impaired, she will be regarded as a disgrace for her whole life, and she will bury a mine for herself, and her life will be over.

so when I was ten years old, when I encountered hooligans, I dared not tell anyone. I had nightmares for two weeks in a row that the man grabbed me and jumped on me. Wake up and cry secretly. I felt very ashamed and dirty. I spent a lot of time taking a bath every day to concentrate on the place where he had pinched me. I think I am not proud because my mother said that if girls are victimized, most of them are due to a lack of awareness of prevention. Then I must be not aware enough to do what needs to be done. Or I wear clothes with a little too much bare skin, which makes the other person think too much. If there are so many kids, why does he bother me?

I am also very angry. Why is it so unfair? Those people are all talking about the little sister. Why didn't anyone accuse the man who raped her of doing such violence to a little girl? Why is it that no one accuses men who beat their wives of being wrong, but always says that women are "slutty"? And I, I was just reading there, there was nothing wrong, I was frightened, I was the one who had nightmares, why should I feel ashamed?

since then I began to think and try to break free from those unnecessary shackles. Over the years of growing up, I have figured out a lot of things.

people, both men, and women should not be ashamed of their bodies, much less should they be ashamed of being violated. To ask why the victim was killed is to make excuses for the perpetrators, not to mention indifference and connivance, all of which are accomplices to the perpetrators.

I have been a rogue activist since then.

but most of the hooligans I met were willing and daring, and it has been ten years since I once again met a hooligan who dared to touch me. I dragged him to the police station. The matter of catching hooligans can be told as a story for everyone's preference.

late summer in Shanghai. The subway was very crowded that day. When I was going back to Songjiang after a classmate reunion in Xujiahui, I suddenly felt a sharp object pressing against my lower body through my skirt. I thought it was the corner of the man's briefcase in front of me, so I moved my crotch away a little bit. Unexpectedly, this sharp object came after me and was stingy. I looked down. Oh, it was the man's little finger with two centimeters of yellowed fingernails. Looking at the nail, I was furious and asked in a loud voice, "where are you touching TMD?" The man was stupefied for a moment and didn't expect my reaction. I squeezed his hand and raised it and asked again: "where did TMD touch your dishonest hand?" He hesitated and said hurriedly, "what are you talking about?" I looked him in the eye and scolded loudly in the middle of my feet."Mom! Yes! salty! pig! Hands! Play! Stream! Rascal! "

here comes the best part. At such times, it is estimated that all the hooligans will say angrily, "you are a sister-in-law!" Say such a thing in broad daylight! I don't know the shame! "

this is the old saying. I am a girl, how can I be ashamed? at that moment, I suddenly felt that in the past long time, all the people who described or defined this shame to me, and all the people around me who are either indifferent or afraid of getting into trouble, are in fact accomplices of hooligans in the end.

I scolded back loudly (I also recommend all girls to do so in this situation):

what am I ashamed of? You TMD sexual harassment on the subway in broad daylight, do such a shameless thing do not know shame, but also TMD has the nerve to talk about me? Why are you so shameless?!

there were too many people around him, so he leaned against the door. I figured he was going to run away. I benefited from the fact that I still had a lot of tendon flesh in my body when I exercised properly. I counted it within three seconds and was able to beat it. (if I encounter hooligans, it is very important to measure my combat strength.) He stepped up and grabbed him by the collar and said, "you and I are going to see the police." I dragged him down as soon as the door opened. I imitated the way my father took the prisoner, staring hard, using only the simplest words, be sure to roar, such as "go!" And "come here!" In the case of similar strength, it is the same as fighting. He panicked and struggled, but he didn't break free. He pulled a button off his chest, saying that I had to pay him. There were more and more onlookers around, and someone quietly joked about how the little lovers were fighting. I yelled at my TM to catch the hooligans, this man harassed me, who was a couple and he was paralyzed and looked so ugly! The other side shut up and made way. I started dragging him up to the guard room. The hooligan began to threaten me that this matter would let me know how powerful I was. I stared at him with a laugh and said that you were fierce enough to show me that he was a pussy. I dragged while shouting "catch hooligans", he angrily began to say that I am not ashamed, what hooligans, who are hooligans, I said you are not hooligans TMD who is, where did you just touch the hands so dishonest? And kept calling him shameless.

dragged to the top, he got scared and became stronger, so we were deadlocked at the elevator, but the noise was too loud and attracted the police on duty. Asked about the situation and took us into the duty room.

at this time, the hooligan looked scared, but he refused to admit it, blamed me for slander, and kept saying that he had something urgent for the police to let him go. I said I have an emergency, too, but we can put things on hold until this is settled. The police asked me if I had any evidence and asked me to prove it. I said, how can I prove it? a little girl with a flat head and a full face is so idle to slander a fly-like man with such a thing. The rascal bites to death and said he didn't touch it, but he accidentally ran into it. The policeman first scanned his ID card, asked us some other questions, and locked him in the soundproof room first. At this time, the best part came again: the uncle advised me that it was not easy to do, and there was no proof, and it was not good for me to make such a scene. I was advised to make peace or let him pay a sum of money, and they could just intimidate the man. It is said that in fact, this kind of thing happens a lot, and most girls put up with it. He also said that the man was married and must have been angry at home to do this.

I was on fire. But at a time like this, you can't let go, but you can't speak bluntly, so I calmed down for three seconds but asked my uncle very quietly, "Uncle, I think you should be about the same age as my father." My father is also a policeman. Uncle, do you have any children? " The uncle said there was a daughter in high school. I said, "what will you do if something like this happens to your daughter? "the uncle choked and said nothing. I continued, "I have a bad temper, so how many girls did he touch before me?" He has become a thief again, will he do something worse than touching? You also said that it happens a lot. Then let it go today, will he be more unscrupulous in touching girls in the future? How many girls are left to be harmed? I don't want him to lose money. I don't want it. Today, he fell into my hands. I have no other purpose, so I have to let him know how good he is, and let him know that don't take girls as soft persimmons. There are girls like me that he can't afford to eat one at a time. "

Uncle was moved by me, so he called out to the man, asked him to hand over his ID card again, and said, "Don't say you didn't do it on purpose. I know it all." It is said that it is impossible to punish you legally, but you, as a person, have to register on our criminal information network. if you are dragged in by someone else because of this next time, you will be in the police station! You must be severely punished! " Then the uncle turned around and asked me, "what do you think, little girl?"

I said, "I ask for three things: first, admit that he played hooligans and formally apologize to me." Second, be sure to register his identity. Third, contact his wife or family to pick someone up. I'm not leaving without people coming. Quote;

at this time, the police uncle pressed his position to take a landing photo, and the hooligan collapsed, cried, and began to admit that he was "temporarily confused" and begged me for forgiveness. I mean, you're such a scum. Anyway, I started mocking max mode when I entered the police station. The police may advise you to make peace, but they won't advise you not to swear. Be sure to use the most masculine words, such as scum, loser, loser, etc.) and I have stressed again and again that there are many good girls now, so he had better be careful not to do anything again.

finally, the policeman registered him on the criminal information network and scared him in front of me (I sat on his knees). But the police uncle told me that he knew that I wanted his wife to come to embarrass him, but most of these people's wives came and pointed at me and scolded me for being a slut to seduce his husband, so don't let his wife come and let the police keep an eye on him. Home. Although I was a little hesitant, I still agreed. After all, I was right by the police alone at that time, and I also left his identity information. If there is a need to settle accounts, there will still be accounts in the future.

when I left, the policeman said to me, "well, the little girl looks beautiful and elegant. I didn't expect it to be so powerful."

I was wearing an ankle-length skirt with medium-long sleeves and combing the princess's hair. It looked "very gentle". Later, when I talked with my friends, I found that hooligans generally did not dare to start on girls who were very hot dresses. They were focused on those who had a good temper.

well, no one helped me throughout that day. Only those who dodge and watch to take pictures.

when my father heard later, he laughed and said she was my daughter and praised me. On the other hand, my mother was very afraid that I would be victimized-she has changed a lot under my influence over the years, but that fear has not changed-that is the shadow imposed on every mother by this patriarchal culture.

and what saddens me most is that when I got home, I said in my moments that I had caught a rascal, and instantly dozens of female friends replied. All kinds of experiences of meeting hooligans, one after another said that I helped them out. I asked one by one, and no one fought back. No. I'm the only one. The reasons are all for fear of further harm, reputational or physical.

but, if you find the other party's behavior, even if you don't catch hooligans and condemn it loudly immediately, you won't put up with the other party's harassment or even stalking. But many women still choose to be silent and patient. This is an old abscess.

indeed, it's not that easy to make a sound. But if you don't say a word, as I told the police uncle, these hooligans, they will be like that disgusting middle-aged man, or that dirty nail, rejoice in women's fear and dodge and chase them all the way.

I escaped once and fought once. And the time I ran away, I don't know which other girls encountered this demon and what happened. I can't think about it. And the time I fought, I knew it was not enough.

if I meet a rascal again in the future, I will embarrass him even more. If I had a daughter, I would educate her about precaution and self-protection, but I would also tell her that her body, as long as she is responsible for herself, is in charge. Never be ashamed of a woman's body. When you encounter hooligans, you have to fight when you can fight, and you have to speak up and ask for help if you can't fight. And no matter what happens, even if bad luck and misfortune, no matter what other idiots say, because to those who love her, she is still here, still the most precious.

as summed up by the battle girls who have encountered hooligans but won, Tips:

encounters hooligans. Prevention and self-protection will always come first! Prevention and self-protection will always come first! Prevention and self-protection will always come first! Say the important words three times! I am in a special situation. First, I can fight. At that time, I caught the hooligan because he was skinny and small. I knew I could beat him. But anyway, it's really good for girls to exercise well in ordinary times! Morbid beauty is also a patriarchal tumor!

when you encounter hooligans, they defend themselves from rational attack. It's cool to catch hooligans once, but if you can't, you must stop them loudly, retreat to places with a large number of people, and keep a certain distance from each other. Never hide in a remote place! Be sure to ignore each other's humiliating attacks (for example, you are "shameless")! If he says you are shameless, he should emphasize again and again that he is shameless and shameless and can't appear afraid! This is as powerful as a fight! And ask for help! At least shout whether there is anyone to help call the police, the general hooligans will leave as soon as possible. Indeed, there are usually many onlookers in the south, but you shout, "which kind brother gives me a hand, this person is playing hooligans in broad daylight." if there are men from the northeast, nine times out of ten, they will help or even go up and beat people up. It's true.

Anti-wolf spray can be prepared. It is best to take the kind of wolf guard that will make a loud noise and flash when you walk at night. It is very easy to use. It must be hung in a convenient place for the bag. Don't use it. I can't find it.

it's best to get into the police station. Even if the police will probably persuade you to make peace, see what I said to the police uncle, and argue with emotion, the police will try their best to help. After the matter is over, it is best to call a friend to pick it up or call the police to see a one-off, to prevent vicious hooligans from following and retaliating nearby.

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the victory of every woman fighting hooligans, big or small, no matter what form, is the victory of women all over the world!

but I hope you will never encounter hooligans.