Daughter-in-law from the stars

A friend of mine has just become a new mother. Because of her proximity, she went to her mother-in-law's house to give birth and raise children. Before the moon came out, she sent me a text message one night saying that she was more distressed, saying that her mother-in-law was more spoiled with her children and that her children were now sleepy and did not hug or sleep. What should she do? My first reaction was: honey, there is no child without sleep in the world. People who have never been mothers find it hard to understand why children can't sleep on their own. They have to hold, milk, contain, lick, coax and accompany them. In short, they just don't sleep. You can also ignore him, let him cry enough, cry tired, and go to sleep, but this is too cruel. In movies and TV dramas, the scene of humming a lullaby and patting the child to sleep can only be realized when the child is a little older. as for the kind of child who falls asleep safely under the company of the bed bell, I think there are, but I have never seen it before. especially the children in the month, more or less need to be held and coaxed. The ancient poem that I can recite is called "Spring River Flower Moon Night". As long as you give me a random start, I can continue to recite the ancient poem that I can recite word for word. Why? Because it was so boring to coax Rest with my son, I memorized the ancient poem one word at a time. The scenery described in "Spring River Flower and Moon Night" is extremely beautiful, and there is no narrative plot of worrying about the country and the people. It is narrow and beautiful, with spring nights, river flowers, sea fog, and night breeze blurring, which can dilute those dreary nights that induce sleep. When I memorized it for the third time, my son asked for Rest.

 In retrospect, in that one-and-a-half-step room of the night, swaying is also some irrecoverable time. The book comes back to the original. My friend thinks that my mother-in-law is too delicate to take care of her children, so she is alarmed. This is a misunderstanding.

but I also know that that's not what she's talking about. there must be something else she can't say, so I said, "all the children are sleepy, it would be better if they were older, but you can try to let it go for a while." see if you can get him used to sleep on his back. Another friend's child found that he was underweight during a half-year-old physical examination and sat chatting with us, saying that his mother-in-law gave supplementary food too early and had seasonings, so the child did not like breastfeeding and eating, and the family was still teasing and praising when eating. Always can't have a quiet meal. She wondered if this was the reason why the child was underweight. I thought about it, but I didn't dare to support her too much, because children vary greatly and are influenced by heredity, and it is too normal for them to develop sooner or later, but I do have reservations about adding seasoning to the child's meal. And the reason why it is called "supplementary food" is to give priority to milk, do not like to eat milk or not too good, after all, milk is more suitable for the growth and development of Shadow. But I know that what she is talking about is not a matter of underweight, but that she does not quite agree with the way her mother-in-law takes care of her children. She probably has different opinions on supplementary food, feeding, and communication. The other girl is a new mother. After reading a lot of parenting books, she is not recommended to pee to avoid pulling out the hip and anal fissure, while her mother-in-law is not. She starts to urinate from the month because the nursing pressure of adults is lighter. And children can develop the habit of defecating regularly. For the sake of not dealing with either side of the matter, if you ask me, there is a point on both sides. This kind of practical problem needs to be solved, rather than asking people to stand in line.

 I will say that I support my mother, but if she is not strong in implementation or is at work all day, she can only watch her mother-in-law give her children shit and get angry every day. If I tell her that no matter how the child can grow up, she will not like to hear because what she needs is information and support. You could have had a rest on Sunday, but at this time, one of your friends asked you to go to her house to help with the move, but you couldn't refuse it. When she refused, she complained that you were not good enough. If you went to help with the move, you had to do it without effort. It's not enough to bump against the furniture. It's not enough to give some labor-saving advice. It's not enough to take care of the meal after moving, but you can only give it to what you eat-- how does it feel? Change the move to take care of the grandson, change Sunday to six years, this is the mother-in-law. I think about my mother-in-law's career in the future, secretly pinching sweat for my daughter-in-law. Or you have to go out on Sunday and ask someone to help you move the furniture for the day. As a result, it is impossible for this person to come, and when he comes, he still has to arrange according to his own preferences. 

How do you arrange it? if you don't make an effort to stand and eat melon seeds and give advice, you can't let her go back. After that, you have to take care of the meal. How does it feel that you can't make do without a meal? Change the move to raise a son and change Sunday to six years. This is my daughter-in-law. When I think about my future career as a daughter-in-law, I will pinch a sweat for myself. There is simply nothing to say on this issue except the right nonsense. If your mother is acting as a mother-in-law in her sister-in-law's house, you will be partial to her mother-in-law; if your sister is acting as a daughter-in-law and enduring her mother-in-law, you will turn to daughter-in-law. The buttocks determine the head, and man is the sum of experience and prejudice, and it is impossible to lift himself out of the earth with his hair. My mother-in-law met a bad mother-in-law when she was daughter-in-law, and she also has two daughters who are daughter-in-law for others, so although she reads little, she is very reasonable and never embarrasses me from each other, so I'll return the favor.

Hassled about buying a suitable dress within your budget? mormon prom dresses may be the answer to your prayers. Shop now and enjoy the pleasant shopping experience.

 If you look at daughter-in-law with a cold eye, you will find that she has the spirit of fighting in all directions after childbirth. She can't get along with anyone except her child, and she can't get along with anyone, including herself. Not to mention mother-in-law, even the husband and mother are tied up, it is not enough to add to her jam. Mother can say the same thing, but mother-in-law can't. Mother can listen to the same thing, but mother-in-law won't listen to it. In addition, if there are grievances before marriage and discord after marriage, for the sake of the car, for the house, for the dowry, for trifles, for a few words, for all the chickens and dogs that are not enough for outsiders, and if the old debts are gone and new ones are added, she doesn't know whether it's against people or things. In such a situation, it is impossible for gods and ghosts. She couldn't get used to the great changes in her physical life. Not only to take care of the children but also to coordinate all kinds of relationships, the challenge comes too suddenly and too quickly, from a simple two-person world, without even a closed test, this kind of intensity and pressure, unless you have adapted to it in the workplace, otherwise, you can't turn around for a while.

oneTime can't tell whether it is a hormonal imbalance or a complicated fact, whether it is the pursuit of truth or a corner, whether it is tolerant or weak and easy to bully, whether there is a bottom line or too much competition, whether it is self-persistence or to selfishness, whether it is cautious or too timid, whether it is the rare confusion of smart people or the confusion of fools. Books can't teach you these things, and no one can help you judge. The daughter-in-law is such an earthling who has taken root from Perseus. In the face of sudden information, objects and people, it is easy to fall into anxiety. Coupled with her husband's slime and pressure at work, any green, organic, harmless girl is easy to enter combat mode minute by minute.

 Those who say, "No one should take care of your children", "how perfect you seem to be a daughter-in-law", "you must be grateful", or "grandchildren should be brought by their parents-in-law", all enter the combat mode and are unreasonable. If I say, "No one should give you retirement", or "I should follow my son to retire", I will inevitably enter the situation of scratching hair, tearing face, and rolling in the quagmire, which will be too embarrassing for each other. I would like to talk about some articles I have seen. The first one is recommended to me by my classmate, to the effect that the German government and enterprises have introduced a series of policies to encourage childbearing: the most interesting one is to coordinate the working companies of both husband and wife and negotiate a set of flexible working hours for each other. For example, the husband last Thursday, Friday or Saturday, the wife Sunday one, two or three, or the implementation of a one-and-a-fortnight system; Or community mutual assistance, such as mothers coordinating their working hours and taking care of each other's children, which is especially beneficial to single mothers, or to further extend the two-year maternity leave and set up a wide range of kindergartens.

 Or setting up a nursery in the company to make it easier for female employees to take care of their children during pregnancy and childbirth while increasing financial assistance for pregnant and childbearing women are all based on solving problems rather than advocating moral standpoint, which is very enlightening. The second article is about the responsibility of the state, which covers a wide range of areas, but there is an interesting formulation, that is, on the issue of women and children, the state should become a "public father" to provide basic survival security to women and children directly beyond men, which is essential for the resolution of marriage and the development of women's rights. Precisely because the governments of developed countries have assumed the role of "public father", marriage is becoming less and less meaningful to a woman and child in these countries, and it is only meaningful to mention gender equality and marital autonomy on this premise. In the society we live in, it is difficult to say that we have the basis to talk about these two things. For women, maintaining a marriage is still the priority to ensure economic security, not only psychological security. It is the inevitable choice to ensure the survival and development of future generations. My idea is whether the state should also assume the role of "public children". From a narrow point of view, it can explain why old people in developed countries do not have grandchildren; broadly, children are no longer born for the sake of old age. it's a relatively free choice. And all this obviously cannot be solved by the realm of competition and the philosophy of existence.